Your relationship is only going to be as strong as your connection with your partner. There are many ways to strengthen this bond including spending time together and investing in shared interests. But when you’re mostly communicating with your partner online, a great way to deepen the connection is by asking the right questions.
Now I don’t mean boring old ‘what are you thinking?’ or ‘how was your day?’ questions. You need to get down and dirty and find out what goes on in the deepest and darkest corners of your significant other’s mind. Here are ten questions that could help.
Ten Must-Ask Questions to Deepen Your Connection With Your Partner
1. What are we?
This question gets a bad rep, especially with new couples. However, it is probably one of the most important ones to ask this early in the relationship. Defining your status lets you know exactly what you are getting into. Trust me the last thing you want is to put in long-term relationship effort in a casual friends-with-benefits set-up.
2. Where is this going?
That is particularly important for couples who have stayed together longer or those in long distance relationships. It is another one that helps put things into perspective for the sake of your future. It is important to note that things do not always go according to plan but it is always better to have a specific end goal in mind.
3. What type of relationship do we want?
Do you want an open relationship? Do you want a sugar daddy/sugar momma type of relationship? Do you want a 50/50 equal partnership? Understanding your couple style is very important. The answer to this question ensures that you are both on the same page regarding your general expectations from each other.
4. What do you think about my family/friends?
If you plan on settling with someone for the long run, then you need to know what your friends and family think about them. It is also important to know what your partner thinks of your close relations. That is important to avoid conflicts in the future.
5. What makes you the happiest?
Here is where you start to get deep. Understanding what makes your partner want to wake up every day is a powerful way to bond. It also gives you an idea of how to cheer them up.
6. If you had a blank cheque what would you spend on first?
It is an important question as it allows you to identify your partner’s priorities. Please note that there is no right or wrong answer here so if your man says he would buy a Ferrari do not crucify him for being materialistic. It is a fun and low-pressure way also to figure out what their deepest desires are.
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7. How can we spice up our sex life?
Do not forget about your physical connection when bonding with your beau. Do not shy away from asking what your partner expects or telling him/her what you want in the bedroom. Or wherever else it is you do it. The answers will allow you to satisfy their needs for a stronger and healthier relationship.
8. Who from your past shaped your life the most?
It is a great way to find out more about your significant other’s past. It could be a teacher who inspires them, a parent who molded their character or even a friend who changed their perspective.
9. What is the most traumatic event in your past?
We all have baggage. It could be anything from a toxic relationship to a devastating loss. It is important to address these issues and identify their potential impact on your relationship. You might even want to consider therapy here if things get a little too dark and heavy.
10. What would you like your legacy to be?
The kind of legacy someone wants to leave tells you a lot about them. The answer to this question will allow you to get a glimpse not only of who your beau is but who they wish they were. It also gives you an idea of whether or not your aspirations in life complement each other.
There are many other questions you need to ask, but these ten are among the most important. They help to see your relationship without the heart shaped lenses in your eyes and as a result, make you a stronger couple. So ask, even when it seems awkward. You will not regret it.